“I can’t be fake/ I can’t be phony/ acting all hard/ that’s when I was just lonely/tried to flex/ I confess, when you left you took the very best thing.”/
So.. the other day I’m listening to “The Best Thing” a new Usher song featuring Jay-Z where they reflect on some of the women that they did wrong and how as grown men they are able to be accountable for this and apologize and in the same token realize the women they have now are the best ones for them and they can appreciate that.
This song was perfect for me because I had been going through a rough situation with my wife and it forced me to think and reflect on my behavior and my past.
I hear Jay-Z say /”the grass is always greener on the other side, this n***a lied/ how could I give a ring up?/ I couldn’t give a f**k, how could I give a finger?/
This forces me to dwell on my situation.. allow me to explain: my wife and I have a Blackberry phone and there is an application called Blackberry chat where you can “chat” or send media in almost an instant text format with another Blackberry user. This past week my wife was out enjoying the day with her best friend and I was at home “chatting with her”.
Somewhere along the conversation she recieves a picture of a young woman pleasuring herself taken from a camera phone! 
She immediately asks me “what the hell did you send me!” and I reply with what I previosuly wrote, I was “eating and watching the idiot box.”
Long story short, she did not believe a word of what I said and and I was immediately in the shitter.
See, I don’t blame her. I tried uselessly to prove my case by showing my exact copy of the conversation and how I had no record of said picture and seeing that the chat feature is unalterable shouldn’t that prove I didn’t send it? In the long run I probably did more harm than good because the story sounded crazy and unbelieveable but it really was the truth and being this never happened before what makes her think I would even have a picture like that?
What does that mean for me if she would even think I would have a picture of a naked woman on my phone? What was I doing that she didn’t know?
My point here is this: I am a rapper and by association I speak with various miscellaneous women ( I call them fans, associates, and such) who like me for whatever reason. Before my wife, I used to be the kind of guy that didn’t give a shit about a woman’s feeling or regards as I was always looking for something better, hence many women didn’t socialize with me outside of the “busyness” but they were still around all through our relationship. So could this be a form of Karma coming back to bite me in the ass now that I wasn’t doing anything??? Since meeting her, I have seemingly become a lot more likeable to women (women.. Yes I do know why!) and because of my past mistakes, I am aware of what it is and how far to keep these people away.
There are women who will stop at nothing to get between a relationship for their personal gain but marriage is something that puts the married woman above all others. (right?) A nude picture from someone who is not your partner would be indicative of a sexual relationship playing out in different areas and would lead me to believe something was “going on”. (right?) So unless I am actually guilty of this, what harm would it be to say one of these “females” sent me an explicit picture? Unless I was equally guilty and protecting someone…
But if I am guilty of anything, it is casual conversation with miscellaneous women. My wife always says that she has no ”male friends” out of respect for me and that I am enough. I feel the exact same way and therefore these women are not my “friends”. The most may be we have worked together in the past or connected at an event for a future prospect and they choose to continue to text/email/call but I do not initiate or reciprocate that.
There are no dates, no dinners, or anything personal in such to even lead a woman other than my wife to feel I am atracted to her because how disrespectful would I be? The fact that my wife knows of everyone is indicative of how open I am about these miscellaneous women. See ladies, most guys think with their “smaller” head but WE do know when we have a great woman! Even though we may not tell you how many women we have turned away and turned down; when we keep it casual it is not becuase we are holding on to these people, we are not wasting our energy that we could spend on you, on them. We try our damndest to keep you first because we know from experience. the grass just looks greener on the other side.
As Jay-Z so eloquently said.. “ This is what it comes to/ Even grass grows/ seeds become plants/ boys become men./ With that said, I am sorry this past incident happened but maybe this happens to allow me to continue to see that the best thing I have ever had and all I have ever needed is in front of me and to appreciate that. 
It’s so plain to see to me I got the one… you’re the best mama!
Ladies, a word of advice… everyone lies… but trust your man if he’s a good man. If he’s giving you no reason to think he is a cheater then do not think he is one. Keep your guard up and if you suspect something confront it head on and your relationship will benefit from the openness. Fellas, as we all do, when you’re having those conversation among your guys and they speak of the trifling things their ladies do and you say how you have a good woman at home and you dont have to worry, give your woman the same. Do not “chill” with a bunch of women as your “friends” if your women isn’t present and be open and honest about the women you do speak to. If they are really a “friend” then its ok for your lady to meet them. (right?)
If not you could end up how we were when we were “littler”, while you’re looking at grass that appears to be greener, the very best thing “for you” could be getting away…
What do you’ll think? Speak on it…
